[Daz217]

I started Diving about 15 years ago and never really had any issues with depth. I recall accidently being at 38M in the Sound of Mull and was quite comfortable there and not unduely worried despite being a relative novice at that time with only a handful of dives under my belt.
I even dived to 44M on the Zenobia on air and a 12L cylinder shortly afterwards(I would not even consider it now)
I had a break of about 10 years and recently returned to the sport. I have done a fair bit and in comparison to my early days i am not as reckless as i once was and am far more knowledgable than i ever was in my youth.
The thing is since my return i have dived to 30M in the Red Sea and been fine and dandy with it. However i recently dived to the Hydrobox in Stoney and did not enjoy the experience in the slightest. I wondered if i was Narced i still don't know all i can describe it as is an overwhelming feeling of "I want the f**k out of here right now." I kept my head although it was screaming at me to bugger off asap. Once i had ascended to about 28M i felt much calmer but the experience of the "I want to bolt" thought scared me a little and left me doubting my abilities.
Next came the Gozo trip and whilst diving in the 20 to 30 M range all was well.
We did the Double Arch at 38M and although i felt uneasy(possibly because of the Stoney incident) i was fine and had no desire or thoughts of bailing out.
I have had similar" i don't like it here" feelings since and it must be said all have been in Stoney. Now i don't know if the Hydro Box incident put the subsequent apprehension in my mind pre dive or wether i suffer narcosis in (relatively) bad viz.
Am i just apprehensive because i am more aware of what can go wrong and my own mortality than i was when i was a young buck in my early 20's?
I was up at Abbs last weekend and no problems at all diving 15m to 20 m range.
I am in honesty a little embarassed by these feelings but wondered what others thought. Apprehension or Narcosis( or maybe Narcosis brought on by apprehension?)
Silly really but bugging me none the less.