[Neill]

In a social group it is evolutionarily useful to have a hierarchy. When we are wounded within the social group we withdraw. Withdrawal is a key indicator of low mood. Crucially humans return to the social group having licked their wounds. When people withdraw in a modern sense that is shown in not going to work, avoiding friends, not doing usual activities, avoidance of activity and social contact. Not calling friends and family. Depressed people often readily accept negatives info and filter out positive info. So if you are depressed and someone doesn't call you think 'they don't like me' whereas normally you may think 'i wonder why they didn't call hope they are ok' or 'they just forgot'. This is not paranoia - it's negative filter or cognitive bias. I often explain this as grey tinted glasses as opposed to rose tinted glasses which people find easy to understand. The world is unchanged but your view of it is effected by your mood.

Because we are social animals we read each other. A socially wounded person shows the states that go with the low mood and withdrawal. Lack of confidence is evident in someones speech ( tone, rate, volume and content) and their behaviour ( good old body language - critically posture, eye contact etc.).

When you have had low mood the temptation is to remain withdrawn and avoidant. Chill out, take it easy and relax. Well only for a short while - licking the wounds. To combat how you feel you must activate yourself. Because we are evolutionaily hunter gatherers we are rewarded biochemically for activity - typically serotonin and the other brain chemicals. The best way to move on from low mood is to do more, get busy. Re-engage with friends and family, do exercise, walk, swim, hoover - whatever (sex is good). Intuitively we think when i feel better I will do x,y and z. However in reality you have to do x,y and z to feel better.

Don't ruminate on past mistakes or problems. Stop any self critical self talk. Experiment to find out if your beliefs are accurate. Gather positive data about yourself. Low mood destroys motivation so you have to drag yourself into activation whether you want to or not. Set small goals. Celebrate your success.


Go diving........... you are a fish.

Nxxx