No kit required...

[A. Berk]

Back in '84 a bunch of us 'commies' were tasked to inspect 26 bridges on the river Nene in Northamptonshire. The project took us to some very interested locations mostly close to pubs. In the summer months the job would have been a 'jolly' but this was February and it was freezing. At around 08:00 we arrive at a fairly remote and old, stone bridge with a lock-gate next to it. Muggins was first to dive that day so I 'dressed-in' and carried out a visual inspection of the three stone pillars of the bridge. The river was running full-bore with melt-water and hanging on to do the job was kind of challenging. I came out and de-kitted, however, there was one more arch that was inaccessible in dive kit - the arch over the tunnel downstream of the lock-gate. We could see down into the tunnel and it was obvious that the water rushing through at a gazzilion knots was no more than 10" deep. But how to get down there, we hadn't a ladder and I sure as sh!t wasn't going to jump. The answer came from the lock keeper who told us that during the summer kids would jump in the river upstream of the lock and "weeeeeeeeeeehoooooo" over it and shoot down through the tunnel. So Tim had the idea of tying a rope to me and once I had gone over the lock and into the tunnel the lads would make fast the line and I'd be stopped mid-tunnel, where I could stand-up and do the inspection. All I had to do was the "weeeeeeeeeeehoooooo" bit - easy.

Tim tied the rope, Colin secured it to a railing and I jumped in the river and drifted toward the lock. I met the mini Niagara feet-first and it was at this point when holes began to appear in our plan. Firstly, there was no time to get out the full "weeeeeeeeeeehoooooo", the torrent was so fast I barely got to "weeee", leaving a full "eeeeeeehoooooo" oustanding and I remember seeing the tunnel in much the same way as Fi drivers see footbridges over a track. Secondly, Colin got his tunnel/rope measurements slightly out, by about 10' too long on the rope length, 11 or 12 would have been good, 10 wasn't. Thirdly, Colin got his 'securing' knot correct - it brought me to a stop, only the stop was outside the tunnel on the downstream side were the shallow torrent met deep river and boiled-up into something like the wake of a warship at full speed. Imagine being towed headfirst behind a vessel at high speed and you'll see where I am now. Strangely, the wake breaking over my head seemed to cover only my mouth and nose, leaving my eyes clear. I could see the riverbank, trees and the clear blue sky, unfortunately I couldn't see anyone on that side of the bridge who could see me and my predicament. You may be thinking, "didn't he carry a knife?", well yes I did, it was on my right calf, though it could have been anywhere on me and not worth a toss as it was impossible to move a limb against the flow of water. I reckoned the next thing I would see would be me drowning.

After what seemed an eternity the torrent changed its pace allowing my mouth clear of the water for just long enough to yell, "LET GO!!!" and then I was submerged again. I was wondering if I would get another chance to call out and if I even could with less air inside me now. The medical profession use a great expression to describe a victims view of heart attacks, 'Impending doom', yeah, thats it, thats what came over me. No-one heard my call but after repeatedly trying to contact me inside the tunnel it was decided to let go of the rope. Instant joy! Bob-up, and swim to the bank, no harm done. In conversation afterwards someone mentioned that the local kids must be fcuking daft to go over that lock and overhearing this the keeper said, "Ah, well, there's nowhere near so much flow in summer you see," - if I'd had any energy left I'd have strangled the old git!

Lesson learned, yeah, either bring a ladder or use child labour.

Berko

[GLOC]

Had something similar on a river crossing exercising on my JSMEL, trapped underwater shouting expletives at the bloke to let the rope go so I could drift downstream. The was February too, just after the storms of 1991, lots of snowmelt in the welsh river!

[Scubee]

Thank you, Berko, for making me laugh this morning.



(although I expect you weren't laughing at the time )

[Buoyant Babe]

Great tale, did make me smile. Child labour, hee hee!