did they really just say that.....

[Keith Whittaker]

Incidently I had a student ask me if he put his left fin on his right foot and vice versa, whether he would swim backwards.

I hope you told them that "yes! it would"

[Sparky]

I was teaching a lady who on taking her mask off in the pool shot to the surface, when we asked her what the matter was we were waiting for the normal answer of "I got water up my nose", instead we got the answer of "I couldn't see you and thought you had left me down there" The DM and I didn't know what to say in response!

[nigelH]

I don't think I could really swim when I learnt to dive. I was always nervous in the water and had rather avoided it. I suspect the swim test got missed as we were just bobbing about with some of the other students who were swimming up and down while the instructor did things and he assumed we all were.

Much later, when I wanted to do DM, I did an 'improvers' course at the local baths and discovered that swimming was no big deal. You just had to roll your mouth up and breathe now and again plus propulsion was with your arms. By then being in the water was just so normal. Also I knew how much lead it takes to sink so there was no risk of getting into any trouble without bricks of the stuff hanging on me.

[bythesea]

I knew a girl on a DM course who would put on full make up before diving, eye liner mascara, lippy, the works.... and do her hair.... never could understand that

[Buoyant Babe]

I knew a girl on a DM course who would put on full make up before diving, eye liner mascara, lippy, the works.... and do her hair.... never could understand that

A nice hair-do makes all the difference on a dive

[Morag]

When i first took Mster Scubee in the pool, he was about 8 - just old enough for pool stuff He had obviously spent too much time listening to me talking crap because after an hour, when we got out, i sent him off to get changed whilst I put the kit away.

he got halfway to the changing room then turned to me with a look of near panic on his face

"Mum......We forgot to do our deco!"

[String]

Ive heard the "im scared of fish, are there any?" numerous times doing DSDs. Luckily that was in greece so i could truthfully answer "no".

Come across the "i dont want to wear this lead, its heavy" a few times too.

[SeaStar]

I've had the "scared of fish" several times - the worst was when working in the Seychelles for an environmental organisation, a women turned up who had a panic attack every time she saw a fish - she had paid to come out for 10 weeks to do reef/fish surveys. I still don't know why she thought this would be a good idea for a holiday.

I also had an 'I'm scared of sharks, are you sure there arn't any' - this was before a pool session.

Arn't students great!

[Dive now work never]

AT Capers once I witnessed a woman rushing out of the shallow water fully kitted up refusing to go back into the water as she didnt like fish, despite her instructor explaining the fish wont hurt.

I never could understand why she has paid to learn to Scuba dive in that case.

Wear a Rebreather and wave a bit of bread round in the shallows................I never realised how fast I could swim backwards............bastward fish won't hurt?!

[Marky Mark]

AT Capers once I witnessed a woman rushing out of the shallow water fully kitted up refusing to go back into the water as she didnt like fish, despite her instructor explaining the fish wont hurt.

I never could understand why she has paid to learn to Scuba dive in that case.

I don't like fish, been diving 12years. And another thing, they're all mutants in Crapenwray.