did they really just say that.....

[mr fantastic]

child to father on try dive how long till i burst a lung

[purple vonny]

The joy of Discover scuba diving!

Irish bloke, putting regulator in his mouth:
"will oi breathe now?"
Answer "yes"


"what do I do if I want to cough?"
Answer "cough"

"It tastes of salt"
Answer "yes, it is the sea"

me: "why did you take your mask off under the water?"
punter: "there was a crab in my mask"
Me: "oh".

"why did you pull your regulator out of your mouth?"
"I wanted to tell you i saw a fish"

"which feet do these flippers go on?"
"yours"

[fatboy]

I knew a girl on a DM course who would put on full make up before diving, eye liner mascara, lippy, the works.... and do her hair.... never could understand that

you should see my brother!

[fatboy]

A nice hair-do makes all the difference on a dive

you should see my brother!

[Blu DL]

AT Capers once I witnessed a woman rushing out of the shallow water fully kitted up refusing to go back into the water as she didnt like fish, despite her instructor explaining the fish wont hurt.

I never could understand why she has paid to learn to Scuba dive in that case.

PMSL!!

[Blu DL]

Blimey, that's some recovery
I take it that was a near drowning incident. In all seriousness, my hat is off to him. I have a irrational fear of heights and I'm getting there. Maybe one day I'll be able to overcome that like your student.

I grew up with a terrible fear of heights- couldn't even go up a step ladder!! I started rock climbing at age 20 and although all my mates were climbing E grades above me, I finally defeated my demons when I lead a 40ft climb at The Roaches nr Leek. I was so scared and so elated at the same time. I don't climb now but don't freak out when I look over cliff edges!! My climbing mates think I'm a nutter for going scuba diving...

[SeaStar]

student: What is it in saliva that stops the mask steaming up?
me: I don't know would you like me to find out?
student: I'm just concerned it might damage my new mask, and what if it gets on my face will it hurt?

[cazyoung]

I suffered a near drowning when I was 5 (freak wave when playing on the beach a long way from the sea) and did not learn to swim until I was 12 (recurrent otitis media). I never thought I would learn to dive and did not really want to learn but my husband was desperate to do so..... I am so glad I did I love it , I still have "moments" but usually manage to do the stop, breathe and concentrate on the good stuff. I do all my diving in warm, relatively good viz- conditions I am comfortable in. I am working towards diving in UK and will probably start with shallow shore bimbles who knows. I did AOW after about 250 dives and have done the pool and theory for rescue diver (earlier this year) which was really really good. I will eventually do the open water bit but not in UK.

[Blu DL]

I suffered a near drowning when I was 5 (freak wave when playing on the beach a long way from the sea) and did not learn to swim until I was 12 (recurrent otitis media). I never thought I would learn to dive and did not really want to learn but my husband was desperate to do so..... I am so glad I did I love it , I still have "moments" but usually manage to do the stop, breathe and concentrate on the good stuff. I do all my diving in warm, relatively good viz- conditions I am comfortable in. I am working towards diving in UK and will probably start with shallow shore bimbles who knows. I did AOW after about 250 dives and have done the pool and theory for rescue diver (earlier this year) which was really really good. I will eventually do the open water bit but not in UK.

I have highest respect for people that overcome their fears and have the courage to do what they want to do - that takes more guts. Well done - can't have been easy to overcome that internal voice screaming GET OUT!!!!!!

[Blu DL]

We have a habit in our club of giving red indian names to our newly qualifieds which are based on their reaction when they jump in Stoney in 6 deg c in a semi dry for the first time - ala Running Wolf, etc-

One chap was 'christened' "screams like a girl" - although he reckons it should be "screams like a marine"

Another was given the name "silent in the water" as he just floated upright like a silent shivering wreck whilst I pointed mockingly from my woolly bear and drysuit!!

All in good fun..... or is it a bit like a public school initiation that 'everyone goes through' (not that kind of initiation - I don't want to join the Tories!) and then relishes their chance to humiliate others when it is their turn