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Non Diving Posts: Discuss Clever cow! in the Non-Diving Related Forums forums: I was watching an episode of "How do they do that" (or some similar title) and there was an item ...

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Old 03-05-06, 01:18 PM
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Clever cow!

I was watching an episode of "How do they do that" (or some similar title) and there was an item on the modern dairy farm.

FFS! The cows have this brush gizmo that is pressure activated and gives them a good rubbing as and when they want it. The dung is scraped away by automatically operated device (chain driven). The cows .... get this .... decide when they want milking and just walk up to the machine!!

They get an auto udder clean, auto fitted milking device. The machine verifies the milk is good to use otherwise milking is aborted and everything is cleaned before re use.

It was great, the cows just queue up with no pushing or jostling (obviously British cows) and amble in through the automatic gate into the milking bit.

Bloody amazing!!

Now, I wonder if this could be developed for humans who could just queue up when they feel like havin sex. All your bits would get auto washed and I suppose the milking device might give some pleasure in the absence of a partner?

Now, I'm sure some of you are thinking that I am suggesting the humans have sex with cows, well, I DO mean human with human. Sex with cows is ridiculous, why, everybody knows humans prefer sheep ..... Well, I prefer emus which are fantastic ..... so long as you keep in step!
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Old 03-05-06, 01:20 PM
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Welcome back Dude!

Juz
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Old 03-05-06, 01:21 PM
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Old 03-05-06, 01:23 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Juz
Welcome back Dude!

Juz
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Old 03-05-06, 01:24 PM
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Only problem is.............

the milking machine doesn't stop til it gets a litre - good luck Finless!
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Old 03-05-06, 01:27 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dive now work never
the milking machine doesn't stop til it gets a litre - good luck Finless!
Ouch! even for a man with ba11s as big as mine!

Juz
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Old 03-05-06, 01:28 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dive now work never
the milking machine doesn't stop til it gets a litre - good luck Finless!
That may cause quite a bit of chafing?

Actually, the machine is programmed to stop before overmilking occurs.
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Old 03-05-06, 01:29 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Finless
That may cause quite a bit of chafing?

Actually, the machine is programmed to stop before overmilking occurs.
how does it know when to stop 'milking', from how far your eyeballs have been sucked into your skull?
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Old 03-05-06, 02:12 PM
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Talking thankyou..

Ah. thankyou all who have contributed.. I am getting strange looks from folks around the office watching me laugh out loud at the contents of this thread..



incoming..
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Old 03-05-06, 02:29 PM
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Automated milking

I saw something similar in Cornwall.
Very content cows queuing to be milked, mind you they were encouraged by the buckets of food in each compartment. I was amazed to see other cows, on their way out, sticking their heads through the bars of those being milked and nicking their food! I never knew cows could be like that!

With all the dung and pee around, my mind never once turned to sex but maybe that's just me

Now exactly how would this 'automated sex' work? What would the females get ?


no reason for that I just like the icon
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