Senility

[Clare Gledhill]

I have been diagnosed with A. A. A. D. D. - Age Activated
Attention Deficit Disorder.


This is how it manifests:

I decided to water my garden.

As I turned on the hose in the driveway, I looked over at my car and
decided my car needs washing.

As I start toward the garage, I notice that there is mail on the
porch table that I brought up from the mailbox earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the
garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full.

So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the
garbage first.

But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I
take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first. I take my checkbook
off the table, and see that there is only 1 check left.

My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the
house to my desk where I find the can of Pepsi that I had been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to move the
Pepsi so that I don't accidentally knock it over. I see that the Pepsi
is getting warm and decide I should put it in the refrigerator to keep
it cold.

As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi, a vase of flowers
on the counter catches my eye--they need to be watered. I set the Pepsi
down on the counter, and I discover my reading glasses that I've been
searching for all morning.

I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going
to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container
with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the
kitchen table.

I realize that tonight when I go to watch TV, I will be looking
for the remote, but won't remember it's on the kitchen table, so I
decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water
the flowers.

I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills
on the floor.

So, I set the remote back down on the table, get some towels and
wipe up the spill.

Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was
planning to do.

At the end of the day:

* The car isn't washed,
* The bills aren't paid,
* There is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter,
* The flowers don't have enough water,
* There is still only 1 check in my checkbook,
* I can't find the remote,
* I can't find my glasses,
* And I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm
really baffled because I know I was busy all day long, and I'm really
tired.

I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some
help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.

[tom]

why are you watering your garden in the middle of the winter when it's raining? :crazy:

I think this is what they call the incident pit - one bad decision leads to everything going wrong...

[Adrian Kelland]

Originally Posted by tom

why are you watering your garden in the middle of the winter when it's raining? :crazy:

I think this is what they call the incident pit - one bad decision leads to everything going wrong...

Hose pipe ban lifted today

[tom]

Originally Posted by Adrian Kelland

Hose pipe ban lifted today

Fantastic. I'm off home now to fill up the storage tower for the summer.

[MATTBIN]

Originally Posted by tom

Fantastic. I'm off home now to fill up the storage tower for the summer.

Nice view out of the back window Tom. Is the razor wire to keep them out or your lot in?

Matt

[DanE]

Nonsense. The reason you got nothing done is because you went diving...



dan

[Okeanos]

Yes, a closer look at the photo it says Alcatraz!!

[tom]

OK. I admit that might not actually be my back garden. :oops:

[yazzyfooty]

Sounds like the menopause to me. Have fun, you will think you are going off your head but take solace in a glass of wine and in a couple of years you can look back and laugh. ;-)

[purple vonny]

You will soon be having CRAFT moments (can't remember a f***ing thing)

And what may be termed "Alzheimers lite"