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Non Diving Posts: Discuss hmm how to get cash off a friend in the Non-Diving Related Forums forums: All I can suggest is that you be honest and explain to her that you need the money back yourself ...

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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 27-03-08, 11:40 PM
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All I can suggest is that you be honest and explain to her that you need the money back yourself and suggest she has a look at her finances and come up with a repayment plan. It doesn't have to be done aggresively and if you can afford to be repaid in installments then so much the better.


It may well be that she needs a bit longer before she is in the position of having surplus money for anything.

The approach really depends on 'how good a friend, how much she owes and how hard you can be about it.

I imagine only you can make that call. Do you have any good mutual friends who might be prepared to intervene.

Friends and money a mix that can be the quickest way to loose both?
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Old 28-03-08, 02:24 AM
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Be straight and be honest, something along the lines of .........

"You are my friend, which is why I lent you money in the first place and this
debt is beginning to impede on that freindship. Yes, true I would like it all
back in one go, but I understand that this may not be possible.

So it would be so much better if you can come up with an idea of how
much you can afford and if we can work out some sort of timescale with a
definate first payment, then we can get back to being good mates."
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Old 28-03-08, 03:32 AM
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Good luck!!!

I sold two crash helmets to a friend when I was off work for 8 months after a bad bike smash. They were the Mrs lids and we'd decided it was time to leave bikes behind us. Both lids together were worth over £600 second hand but as she was a mate and needed a favour as she'd just came off her bike and landed on her head we said £150. Three years on the girl has dodged ever paying and even moved so people can't find her.

I never got heavy with her and never pestered her to often.

Sorry to say you may have lost your funds.

I've learn't a leason on lending
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Old 28-03-08, 07:49 AM
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Wink

Quote:
Originally Posted by applepie
any new suggestions?
Does your friend have a dog, cat or even a small child? If so, kidnap them and leave a ransom note for the exact money owed.

This should help:-

Add Letters » Ransom Note Generator
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Old 28-03-08, 08:04 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by applepie
i think i may have asked this before..

any new suggestions?
You need to make a decision as to whether the friendship is worth more or less than the debt. A friend once told me friendship is worth more than money. I believe him. The difficulty is trying to spot your real friends amongst dozens of acquaintances.

Quote:
now, I'm feeling akward myself about pestering her for the money back, roughly once a month (to conincide with payday).
Yours or hers? If she is low on cash when you ask she is less likely to pay and you are more likely to get upset when she doesn't. If she is constantly in the red you might have a bit of a problem though.

As the others have said, talk to her plainly and honestly[1]. Let her know that you value her friendship and that you don't want the debt standing in the way. That a small regular payment would be enough to reassure you that you are not just being used.

Quote:
I have never understood how people can do that for so long, fob off paying your mate. low cash? spend less unless your seriously hardup and in some deep trouble (which she isnt)
It happens for two reasons in my experience. There are those acquaintances that see you as a soft touch and use your good nature - I don't really need people like that in my life. Then there are friends that have every intention of paying, but just never get around to it. You said she was a bit blonde, does that mean she is easily distracted? Quite often we end up attracted to people that are somewhat opposite to ourselves. You may well be friends because you do not understand her. So it comes back to which you feel is more important, the money or this girl's friendship.


[1]My friends tend to be those people that will put up with it.
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Old 28-03-08, 09:02 AM
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1. Go for a slap up meal and leave through the back door
2. Insist on a mans favour(s)
3. I can get a fair price for alloys in my part of the world, what's her ride?
4. Sell the debt to some heavies.


In all seriousness, communication usually resolves these situations.
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Old 28-03-08, 10:46 AM
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thanks for all the suggestions and offers for help.

I think I will try the installment payment plan thingy, that sounds good to me.

I have lost money in the past to other "friends" most I was expecting it already. But was rather dissappointed that she didnt pay me back from her character I expected better.

I paid some bills for her so she didnt get hit by late charges mainly through my own initiative so it would save her money in the long run i.e she didnt really ask for money/help-ish. but she did say she would pay me back and gave a date that was acceptable to me then.

I dont really know how hard-up she is now, I find the definition of being broke is different for errr younger people (in my experience, its just means they had to moderately cut down on their fun activities as opposed to making some real hard sacrifices and decisions)

No offence "younger" people as what I mentioned above only applys to some people whom I know and what I have experienced.

Now time to go get money from the other friends who owe me money I hate chasing up debts, I kinda expect people to offer it back.
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  #18 (permalink)  
Old 28-03-08, 10:49 AM
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in my experience, even friends can mess you about when money is concerned

ask for it back, plain and simple
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