T*t monday 08

[Diving Dude]

Well T*t monday has finally arrived.

From my post, two years ago

Originally Posted by Dude

Ah, Tit Monday. It's not that far off now, that glorious daywhen, heading into work on the bus, or walking to the Tube, or sitting on the train, you find yourself suddenly chirpier than you have been inmonths.

You find yourself smiling at strangers again. There is a mild involuntary tumescence in your trousers that comes and goes throughout the morning with the comforting regularity of a heartbeat.

And then you get a text around lunchtime from a mate which says: "At last, Tit Monday!" And you instantly understand why you are so happy.

For Tit Monday is that special day in the year when, for the first time, the temperature rises above that magical point which causes girlsgetting dressed in the morning to decide to show a bit of skin.

After months of dull colours and chunky knit, the world's birds suddenly dive into last summer's wardrobe (they've not had chance to buy this season's stuff) and chuck it on without a thought. Your urbanlandscape is suddenly lightened with acres of naked arm and leg and, after many dark months of burrowing, breasts rising to the surface like moles at dusk.

Big breasts in white work shirts straining at the buttons. Small breasts braless in vest tops, the nipples frotted by ribby fabrics. Breasts in summer dresses bouncing in the distance so that they catch your
eye before you even notice there is someone wearing them. Breasts nudging out from the crowd at traffic islands, quivering to cross the road...

And you know it is nearly summer. For previous generations, the arrival of spring was heralded by the sound of the first cuckoo. For us, it is Tit Monday.

Not that it always falls on a Monday. Like Easter, Tit Monday is a moveable feast. Last year it fell on a Friday. Friday 29 April, to be precise, when temperatures maxed out at 22.1C after nothing much
above 16C all year. It last fell on a Monday in 2004, when temperatures leapt to 22C on 24 April.

And then, of course, there is Tit Monday Night. You see, in early summer, temperatures drop off very dramatically when night falls (Tit Friday 2005 dropped away to a parky 11.8C). But the dollies are not prepared.

Slightly stunned by the morning heat, they drag out the summer clothes but forget to bring a cardie (a mistake they will not make again until next year), so that when they're all standing outside All Bar One after work celebrating the arrival of spring, their barely covered nipples have no protection from the cold. It's like a Bring-and-Buy sale where everyone has brought hat pegs. It's like a prog-rock gig where, instead of lighters, everyone is holding up nipples.
So when will Tit Monday fall this year? Will you be the first to text your mates with the announcement? Do not shoot your bolt too early.

There will be false starts. You will smell fresh cut grass and see a couple of early starters and feel compelled to declare Tit Monday. But your more level-headed friends will tell you to hold your horses,

keep your powder dry, don't fire until you see the whites of their bra straps
As the poet said: one bold Northern slapper in a bikini doth not a summer make.

That last line makes me think of Buoyant Babe

[Sixsquid]

Well I was so cold at 2am this morning I got in my sleeping bag ! and I am now wearing a roll necked jumper trying to minimise anyone seeing just how f-ing cold I am

Spring is officially here when the men working outside start showing their bare chests and wear nothing under their fluorescent jackets

[ratcliffe]

I've been using the T*t Monday phrase ever since you posted that two years ago. We love it in our office. We are on the first floor over looking the street, the views are quite good on T*t Mondays...

[Diving Dude]

Originally Posted by Sixsquid

Spring is officially here when the men working outside start showing their bare chests and wear nothing under their fluorescent jackets

We were down to tee shirts on the scaffolding this morning and l will be when l go back.

Part of the beauty of t*t monday is that it's still a little cold which ....er....enhances certain bits.

[Sixsquid]

Originally Posted by Diving Dude

We were down to tee shirts on the scaffolding this morning and l will be when l go back.
Part of the beauty of t*t monday is that it's still a little cold which ....er....enhances certain bits.

Or makes them retreat

[dry suit diver]

Originally Posted by Diving Dude

We were down to tee shirts on the scaffolding this morning and l will be when l go back.

Part of the beauty of t*t monday is that it's still a little cold which ....er....enhances certain bits.

chapel hat pegs or from your town Scammell wheel nuts

[Buoyant Babe]

Originally Posted by Diving Dude

Well T*t monday has finally arrived.

From my post, two years ago


That last line makes me think of Buoyant Babe

You calling me bold?

[copperband]

...but isn't today Wednesday?

Oh and with the sleet showers on the drive in to work today I would have to disagree.

To quote you

Do not shoot your bolt too early.

[Diving Dude]

'cuse me, but it's against YD rules to disagree with the official T*t Monday caller.

All that matters is its great in the center of the universe, i.e here in NW London.

If you read it again, T*t Monday doesn't have to be on a monday, l'd have thought that was obvious.

[dublinbay]

Originally Posted by dry suit diver

chapel hat pegs or from your town Scammell wheel nuts

Thats not a nice way to refer to raspberries.............