Ok, haven't had one of these for a while

[wannadivenotwork]

so i thought i would share it with you.

I need some idea's as to the response. Something cutting, yet witty, but with a small helping of intelligence (which, I assume, they feel I am devoid of). Any suggestions?

Good day and compliment,
A CRY FOR HELP,I am writing this letter in confidence believing that if it is the wish Of God for you to help me and my family, God almighty will bless and Reward you abundantly. My family and I are true Christians and worship's God truthfully. I got Your contact through Internet during my research on some one who could Help us. I am a female student Of University of Nigeria, Lagos. I am 22 yrs old. My fathers died earlier two months ago and left my Mother I and my brother behind. He Was a king, which our town citizens titled him before his death I was a Princess to him and I and my brother are the only people who Can take Care of his wealth now because my mother is not Capable enough To know all my fathers wealth behind. He left up to USD (27.350,000.00) Twenty seven million three hundred and fifty thousand dollars, with a security Company,and I dont know how and what I will do to invest this money Somewhere in abroad, so that my fathers kindred will not take over what Belongs to my father and our family, which they were planning to do Without my present because I am a female as stated by our culture in the Town. That is why I felt happy when I saw your contact which I strongly believe that by the grace of God, you will help me secure And invest this money. I thereby need your help in bringing the box Containing the money out from the security company, based on your reply I Will furnish you with more details on how we can proceed. I am ready to pay 10% of the total amount to you if you help us in Securing this money and another 10% interest of Annual Income to you, for investing this money for us, which you will strongly have absolute Control Over. If you can handle this project sincerely and also willing to assist me In lifting this fund, kindly reach me and I will let you know the next Step to take towards actualizing this transaction as quickly as Possible. Please, note that this transaction is 100% risk free. I look forward hearing from you soonest. Yours sincerely,
Princess and family

T O S S E R S !!!!!

[Dominic]

Just click here

[Gareth Burrows]

simply do not respond. For the following reason

1. The spammer almost certainly is spamming a domain, and thus is not aware of your existence. Replying will confirm that this is a valid email address, and will allow them to continue to spam you, as well as sharing your email address with others of his/her ilk

2. These 419 scams should not be taken lightly. There have been cases of people being kidnapped and murdered whilst "negotiating" with these scammers. In your intray it looks like a joke. It's not.


Your best bet is to press delete and forget about it, or use a free spam blocker such as K9 to intercept it before it arrives

[Bunny]

I just received a txt message (twice as it happens) informing me that this dating service had been contracted to contact me on behalf OF SOMEONE I KNOW. (uhuh..) All I have to do to find out who it is, is call a landline number (at the bargain price of 1.90 p/m - what price happiness?) and all will be revealed.

[Dominic]

Try signing up for the telephone preference service - I've not had any junk texts since I signed up for it..

[Gareth Burrows]

the TPS is making us a fortune at work writing applications that de-dupe people's databases against the online TPS database

It's a really killer for small businesses at £3750 per year to access the database though. Law wasn't really thought through very well tbh