Only in America...

[Mr T.]

Talk about the emperor's new clothes!

http://www.roadsideamerica.com/attract/VTWILspider.html

[Mr T.]

1,420 calories in America's new monster hamburger
By Marcus Warren in New York
(Filed: 18/11/2004)

America's appetite for junk food has taken on terrifying new proportions in the form of the highest calorie hamburger ever marketed to a nation already sick from overeating.

The Monster Thickburger is nothing less than a "monument to decadence", declares Hardee's, the chain pandering to the country's worst instincts for greed and gluttony.

The burger, which packs a bulging 1,420 calories and 107 grams of fat per portion, also bucks the trend of fast-food restaurants offering healthier alternatives.

"It's not a burger for tree-huggers," said a Hardee's executive, rejoicing in their defiance of the fad for salads and "Atkins-friendly" menus.

"It's a lot," one bloated diner said yesterday after surviving the challenge of eating one in Pennsylvania. "It tastes better than you might suspect. But I think it's a special treat more than a regular meal."

The Monster Thickburger consists of two slabs of Angus beef (664 calories) and four rashers of bacon (150 calories) with three slices of processed cheese (186 calories), plus mayonnaise (160 calories), sandwiched between a sesame seed bun (230 calories) spread with butter for a final 30.

The equivalent of two Big Macs, it costs a mere £3. For £1 more, you can throw in a medium fries and a soft drink and consume an adult's recommended daily intake of calories at one sitting.

The burger requires "two hands, a firm grip and a serious appetite", Hardee's boasts. It is also a "heart attack in a bun", say nutritionists.

The company is not as widely spread in America as McDonald's or Burger King.

But by gambling on bigger burgers, it is earning notoriety - and market buzz.

However, it also increases the company's exposure to the threat of lawsuits from customers blaming its food for their obesity, diabetes, heart problems or other conditions linked to poor diet.

Attempts to sue McDonald's for health problems have so far failed, but the litigation threat is still taken seriously by company executives.

Hardee's previous attempt to seduce big eaters was the plain Thickburger.

"If the old Thickburger was 'food porn', the new Monster Thickburger is the fast-food equivalent of a snuff movie," the Centre for Science in the Public Interest commented.

[HelenM]

ARKANSAS CITY (EAP) -- A Little Rock woman was killed yesterday after
leaping through her moving car's sunroof during an incident best described
as a "mistaken rapture" by dozens of eye-witnesses.

Thirteen other people were injured after a twenty-car pile-up resulted
from people trying to avoid hitting the woman, who was apparently
convinced that the rapture was occurring when she saw twelve people
floating up into the air, and then passed a man on the side of the road
who she believed was Jesus.

"She started screaming `He's back! He's back!' and climbed out through the
sunroof and jumped off the roof of the car," said Everet Williams, husband
of 28-year-old Georgann Williams who was pronounced dead at the scene.

"I was slowing down but she wouldn't wait till I stopped," Williams said.
She thought the rapture was happening and was convinced that Jesus was
gonna lift her up into the sky," he went on to say.

"This is the strangest thing I've seen since I've been on the force," said
Paul Madison, first officer on the scene.

Madison questioned the man who looked like Jesus and discovered that he
was on his way to a toga costume party, when the tarp covering the bed of
his pickup truck came loose and released twelve blow-up sex dolls filled
with helium, which then floated up into the sky.

Ernie Jenkins, 32, of Fort Smith, who's been told by several of his
friends that he looks like Jesus, pulled over and lifted his arms into the
air in frustration and said "Come back," just as the Williams' car passed
him, and Mrs. Williams was sure that it was Jesus lifting people up into
heaven as they drove by him.

"I think my wife loved Jesus more than she loved me," the widower said
when asked why his wife would do such a thing.

When asked for comments about the twelve sex dolls, Jenkins replied "This
is all just too weird for me. I never expected anything like this to
happen."

[Dr Stevil]

Hmmm.. finding this hard to swallow.

Besides, WTF is "a rapture"? As if it's something which happens with some regularity, but if it did you can be sure it'd be in Sticksville, Arkansas,
And how come retard rednecks are the only people to be abducted by aliens? Don't you think any creature which had travelled a minimum of 4 light years to get here would want a fully functional specimen for their collection?

[beanie]

Originally Posted by Steve W

Hmmm.. finding this hard to swallow.

Besides, WTF is "a rapture"? As if it's something which happens with some regularity, but if it did you can be sure it'd be in Sticksville, Arkansas,
And how come retard rednecks are the only people to be abducted by aliens? Don't you think any creature which had travelled a minimum of 4 light years to get here would want a fully functional specimen for their collection?

have you not seen the grolsh advert?

[Dr Stevil]

Ah.. they pick the rednecks cos they're all tanked up on lager, I get it.


Do you think a juiced up alien would still say "Yer me best f***ing mate ye are, Ah love yer yer, a diamond geezer...." etc

[beanie]

Originally Posted by Steve W

Ah.. they pick the rednecks cos they're all tanked up on lager, I get it.


Do you think a juiced up alien would still say "Yer me best f***ing mate ye are, Ah love yer yer, a diamond geezer...." etc

errr

no

they take the Grolsh after rejecting the red neck

[Dr Stevil]

Aha.. not hard to guess who spends more time playing on his 'puta than watching telly...

[Special K]

Helen, what is your source on this one?

[Dinger]

Not sure about the truth of the story but if any of you watch Six Feet Under this was one of the deaths in the recent series were a women saw the dolls floating off and let her car roll out onto the road and was broadsided by a No52 bus.

Dinger

PS the Rapture is what some evangelicals in the US call 'The Apocolypse' - it comes from Revelations in the Bible. There is a very interesting show I have been watching on Channel 4 about evangelical religions in the US called 'Beam Me Up Jesus' and it mentions the 'Rapture' alot. Do a google search and there are loads of website predicting The Apocolypse.