Result! Missus Woz hates Ikea too

[Kirstie]

Perhaps it's one of those starfish-shaped finger puppets called Titta? For those long, boring deco stops?

[Scubee]

Originally Posted by Bantam

What about a nice cuddly toy?



That is, as usual, holding an enormous carrot.

Isn't that the same as the one Chanelle has?

Anyway. I will have you guys know that IKEA saved me from insanity and goodness knows what other dreadful fate. Five years ago, during a very black time, I spent from Christmas day until New Yeasrs Eve drinking wine of various colours and constructing a house full of IKEA purchases with only a screwdriver and a drill as tools. Most of it is still standing too.

I liked their veggie stuff. the stuff you get served with jam or something. Can't remember what it is called.

[chrisch]

Originally Posted by Woz

Lingonberry. WTF is a lingonberry?

They're called "cow berries" in England.

Nothing to do with

Oh no

(or

either) Oh no.

Chris

[Finless]

I had to find out ............. I thought they had misspelled 'loganberry"!

Vaccinium vitis-idaea - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

[Woz]

Originally Posted by Kirstie

Oooh, oooh, is it one of their big blue plastic carrier bags that you can carry dive kit in?

Well done. Blue Ikea bags are like Spanish grandmothers- they have no known load limit. We use them for wet washing, moving rubble in the garden and of course dive kit. 25p. Brilliant.

As a prize here are the photos of the Ikea butt plugs. Enjoy.

[Kirstie]

Originally Posted by Woz

Well done. Blue Ikea bags are like Spanish grandmothers- they have no known load limit. We use them for wet washing, moving rubble in the garden and of course dive kit. 25p. Brilliant.

As a prize here are the photos of the Ikea butt plugs. Enjoy.

I don't wish to seem ungrateful, but can't I have a better prize?

Don't forget, I nearly got a job with Westward Bound. There isn't much you can tell me about butt plugs and their wily ways.

[Bantam]

Originally Posted by tom

confession: there have been times when I have gone into Ikea specifically to get a hotdog. and some of that really sugary red drink they have. Not the chips though, they're crap.

Last Tuesday Post-Dentists I went to Robin Hood in Heckmondwike to pick up my tested tanks, but the return journey passed me by Ikea.

I popped in for a wander round - had some meatballs and a coke for lunch - did the Woz trick of picking loads of stuff up on my way round in my nice yellow bag, and then I just abandoned it in the huge warehouse bit by the checkouts.

I nearly bought a set of those very very funky colour changing LED flat disc lights -

(the ones that look like they've been robbed out of a philips ambilight TV set. )

Then I saw sense and thought 'They might look cool, but where the fcuk would I put them amongst the other tat I own'.

However, I did leave with a couple of things - a bag of meatballs and 5 sachets of meatball gravy (if you've ever tried to find it anywhere else you'll know why as you can only seem to buy this from Ikea!)

[tom]

about 4 years ago I bought string of waterproof battery powered LED lights from IKEA. I can't remember why, and they're still lying up in the loft with all my other crap. no meatballs though.

[Buoyant Babe]

Originally Posted by tom

about 4 years ago I bought string of waterproof battery powered LED lights from IKEA. I can't remember why, and they're still lying up in the loft with all my other crap. no meatballs though.

I'd have thought your loft would be a bit smelly by now if you did have

[Scubee]

But isn't that the whole idea of IKEA. You go for something specific, like a new Roger [1] and you come out with a dive bag full of crap which makes the cost of Roger about the same as if you had bought a decent one in B&Q or somewhere. They make more money on the £3 light system, or the £5 for 5,000 t-lights so profits are increased. They don't owrk properly, and they are a spur of the moment thing, so you think, oh well, they were only a couple of quid, and toss them out.

(but you keep roger)


P.s. They do a really nice shower curtain which has blue blobs of liquid in it. Sadly the blue blobs dry up after about 3 years and then it looks really manky.






([1]Its a CHAIR!! - god you lot are sooooo mucky)