Poxy "baby"!

[Finless]

I'm not sure why but I do not like babies. In fact, I think they make me feel unwell - the smelly parasitic poop machines!

Anyway, why is it when babies are mentioned on TV there is no definite article or personal pronoun used? eg Does baby cry often. Baby will like this. Does baby puke orange vomit whilst its wrinkled stupid head spins round on its stubby neck?

The only way I'll ever have a baby is if I'm marooned and there is nothing else to eat!

[Steve S]

Originally Posted by Finless

The only way I'll ever have a baby is if I'm marooned and there is nothing else to eat!

Never say never Bryan, with all that probing the aliens perform on you there's a fair chance you'll be impregnated one day

Safe diving,
Steve

[Stesh]

[Kirstie]

Originally Posted by Finless

I'm not sure why but I do not like babies. In fact, I think they make me feel unwell - the smelly parasitic poop machines!

Anyway, why is it when babies are mentioned on TV there is no definite article or personal pronoun used? eg Does baby cry often. Baby will like this. Does baby puke orange vomit whilst its wrinkled stupid head spins round on its stubby neck?

The only way I'll ever have a baby is if I'm marooned and there is nothing else to eat!

I hate this as well. I also hate it when the person who's given birth to the thing is referred to as 'mother', as in:

'Mother might need a size or two bigger maternity pants since she's been using her pregnancy as an excuse to stuff her face.'

[Richard Mason]

Originally Posted by Kirstie

I hate this as well. I also hate it when the person who's given birth to the thing is referred to as 'mother', as in:

'Mother might need a size or two bigger maternity pants since she's been using her pregnancy as an excuse to stuff her face.'

Not all of them, my dearly beloved looked like a piece of string with a big knot tied in the middle.

[Kirstie]

Originally Posted by Richard Mason

Not all of them, my dearly beloved looked like a piece of string with a big knot tied in the middle.

How attractive.

[Finless]

Originally Posted by Richard Mason

Not all of them, my dearly beloved looked like a piece of string with a big knot tied in the middle.

Reef knot?
Bowline?
Slip-ped her one knot?

[turbanator]

Originally Posted by Finless

Anyway, why is it when babies are mentioned on TV there is no definite article or personal pronoun used?

Because who cares?

[Scubee]

Originally Posted by Finless

Anyway, why is it when babies are mentioned on TV there is no definite article or personal pronoun used? eg Does baby cry often. Baby will like this. Does baby puke orange vomit whilst its wrinkled stupid head spins round on its stubby neck?

So as not to offend anyone. If they called the pooer 'he' then mothers might think that their baby, being a girl, doesn't poo. And if they called it 'she' then mothers of boys would feel deprived {1}. Like we don't already.... have you tried buying decent clothes for male children??? racks and bloody racks of pink tutu's and other dreadful miniteen stuff, but half a rack of shite for boys. We don't WANT them to look like they have an ASBO!


{1}(Because, as we all know, pregnancy sucks the brains out of mother but most of us get it back within minutes of the birth )


(sorry... rant over )

[Kirstie]

Originally Posted by Scubee

So as not to offend anyone. If they called the pooer 'he' then mothers might think that their baby, being a girl, doesn't poo. And if they called it 'she' then mothers of boys would feel deprived (sorry... rant over )

So what's wrong with 'it'?