Nasty Rash?

[Hickdive]

Back in December I got a rather unexpected text message from the local GUM clinic. It basically said, 'you've got the clap, come and see us asap'

I was momentarily taken aback by this but then I thought 'Aha, I don't recognise the number but it's clearly someone trying to have a laugh - no one would EVER seriously send a text like that'. So I deleted it and forgot about it.

Today, I got another identical text. I thought it was a little odd that someone would try the same prank again so I looked a little closer. I realised the area code of the phone number quoted in the text as being from the healthboard (Mrs H works for them, hence I recognised it). I double checked on the internet and, sure enough, the number was kosher so I phoned them.

It turns out that they'd decided that texting people with their results was a great idea but, unfortunately in my case, they'd got the wrong number, twice.

JEBUS BEGGARING FECK! Who in their right mind can possibly imagine, in their wildest dreams, that sending out text messages telling people they've got the clap, when you could obviously get the wrong number or get the right number but cause some right bloody grief if the wrong person read it is a good idea?

It is patent insanity! Whatever happened to patient confidentiality?

[Dave Crampton]

When I was in the army, one of the guys used to be in the Royal Signals Rugby Team. They used to take it in turns washing the kit. They would take the whole team strip home on a rota to wash. One day one of the guys took the kit home but didn't wash it and they wore it the next game before it went home with the next guy. Only one of the team had crabs. The warm moist environment meant the crabs spread easily amongst the kit. Most the the team caught crabs as a result, and a few of the team were on the brink of being turfed out by their wives. It only came to light later.

[Reikimaster]

Originally Posted by Dave Crampton

When I was in the army, one of the guys used to be in the Royal Signals Rugby Team. They used to take it in turns washing the kit. They would take the whole team strip home on a rota to wash. One day one of the guys took the kit home but didn't wash it and they wore it the next game before it went home with the next guy. Only one of the team had crabs. The warm moist environment meant the crabs spread easily amongst the kit. Most the the team caught crabs as a result, and a few of the team were on the brink of being turfed out by their wives. It only came to light later.

well thats your story and and your sticking to it