Technical Diver Bullshit Bingo

[purple vonny]

Full face mask blob - the result of some messy coitus on a rocky boat.

[Timbobaggins]

I was sitting here suffering a bit with "Decompression," because i was trying to work out an "Algorithm," well if i had been suffering from "Narcosis," by not enough "Oxygen," and i did not have the correct "Gradient Factor," Then all the "Blending," of "Nitrogen," with some "Helium," in the "Stage cylinder," would have been no use to me at all. As i pulled out my regulator from behind a "Bungee," I thought if only my stages were "Stainless Steel,". Well as i decompressed i thought of what i would do when i get home. I could "Whip" my wife or "Hose" down my kit. As i dekitted and undid my crotch "Strap" i realised i needed to order more "Sofnolime". I phoned AP Diving who wanted £70 a drum. Are you taking the "Pee" i said. I also ordered a new "Valve", Its made by "Overton Meyer". What the fuck is an"Isobaric Counter Diffusion". My "Lungs" heaved as i saw my mates new "Full Face Mask", i was really jealous so we sat at a "Table" and argued we really needed a "Regulator". That evening i pumped my "Twinset". I had whipped my wife she once was a "Gradient Model", she was always photographed on hills!!!! Her best mate "Bubbles" once had "DCI", He was "bent" as fuck. To be honest he was a bit of a fat "Blob". That evening i prepared the deco "Trapeze" as i had just bought a "Rebreather". I read about high "Set Point" And realised if i got it wrong my mates would think i was a right "Doppler". I tested the "Loop" and packed the "Scrubber", whilst dressed all in "Rubber" By now i was tired `and felt like a little "Nappy". It must have been due to sub-clinical "deco". Well i lost my "bottle". I told my fellow "team member". I'll have your "long hose" for "redundancy" then he said. You need to get "hyperbaric", what was your "M value" and "run time". Also did yiu do the correct "gas switching" he asked. I felt down and in the "Black". I must have cut the wrong "Run Times". i felt all "Snoopy Loops". As i made this all up "On the Fly".

[deepestandy]

Originally Posted by Timbobaggins

I was sitting here suffering a bit with "Decompression," because i was trying to work out an "Algorithm," well if i had been suffering from "Narcosis," by not enough "Oxygen," and i did not have the correct "Gradient Factor," Then all the "Blending," of "Nitrogen," with some "Helium," in the "Stage cylinder," would have been no use to me at all. As i pulled out my regulator from behind a "Bungee," I thought if only my stages were "Stainless Steel,". Well as i decompressed i thought of what i would do when i get home. I could "Whip" my wife or "Hose" down my kit. As i dekitted and undid my crotch "Strap" i realised i needed to order more "Sofnolime". I phoned AP Diving who wanted £70 a drum. Are you taking the "Pee" i said. I also ordered a new "Valve", Its made by "Overton Meyer". What the fuck is an"Isobaric Counter Diffusion". My "Lungs" heaved as i saw my mates new "Full Face Mask", i was really jealous so we sat at a "Table" and argued we really needed a "Regulator". That evening i pumped my "Twinset". I had whipped my wife she once was a "Gradient Model", she was always photographed on hills!!!! Her best mate "Bubbles" once had "DCI", He was "bent" as fuck. To be honest he was a bit of a fat "Blob". That evening i prepared the deco "Trapeze" as i had just bought a "Rebreather". I read about high "Set Point" And realised if i got it wrong my mates would think i was a right "Doppler". I tested the "Loop" and packed the "Scrubber", whilst dressed all in "Rubber" By now i was tired `and felt like a little "Nappy". It must have been due to sub-clinical "deco". Well i lost my "bottle". I told my fellow "team member". I'll have your "long hose" for "redundancy" then he said. You need to get "hyperbaric", what was your "M value" and "run time". Also did yiu do the correct "gas switching" he asked. I felt down and in the "Black". I must have cut the wrong "Run Times". i felt all "Snoopy Loops". As i made this all up "On the Fly".

And the definition...?

[Timbobaggins]

Originally Posted by deepestandy

And the definition...?

Urm Bullshit i think

[yazzyfooty]

Originally Posted by purple vonny

Full face mask blob - the result of some messy coitus on a rocky boat.

Thats gross!! <boak>

[purple vonny]

I know. Sorry.

[MattS]

For sale;

Oxygen Gradient Factor Nitrogen Isobaric Counter Diffusion Stainless Steel Blending Whip. Optimal team member stage cylinder deco bottle recharging on the fly.

Like any other blending whip but worth more on e-bay

[Howard Payne]

To be worth more on Ebay - it has to have the word "DIR" in the title - works a treat

[wilbo]

When setting your isobaric counter diffusion (aka your gradient model) be sure to check that your students [counter diffusion] lungs have a hyperbaric M value of 'A'. For those using twinsets - ensure that your deco bottle/stage cylinder has Overton Meyer Snoopy loops. If your chosen dive unit is a rebreather then wear a rubber nappy () ensuring your set point has a doppler value of 1.2. Should you encounter Decompression then use Trapeze tabes with the Narcosis gradient factor of oxygen.

[Garf]

Originally Posted by wilbo

When setting your isobaric counter diffusion (aka your gradient model) be sure to check that your students [counter diffusion] lungs have a hyperbaric M value of 'A'. For those using twinsets - ensure that your deco bottle/stage cylinder has Overton Meyer Snoopy loops. If your chosen dive unit is a rebreather then wear a rubber nappy () ensuring your set point has a doppler value of 1.2. Should you encounter Decompression then use Trapeze tabes with the Narcosis gradient factor of oxygen.

worryingly thats how gloc talks.