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I'm so fat..... I'm so fat.....
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Surface Interval: Discuss I'm so fat..... in the General Diving Forums forums: In a couple of threads lately I have refered to myself as being fat. Although I would not describe myself ...

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Old 30-04-08, 12:03 AM
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Dave Abraham Dave Abraham is offline
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I'm so fat.....
In a couple of threads lately I have refered to myself as being fat. Although I would not describe myself as skinny i'm not really that big. So with that in mind I thought I'd start a thread where you can do fat jokes but they have to be about yourself.

Rules are all jokes have to start with either of the following

I'm not fat but.....
or
I'm so fat........

So I will start the ball rolling

I'm not fat but.....last time I dived at Hodge close my buddies had to use 20lb of lard and a winch to get me through the tunnel
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Last edited by Dave Abraham : 30-04-08 at 12:09 AM.
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Old 30-04-08, 04:59 AM
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I'm not fat but kids make beeping noises when I walk backwards.

I'm not fat but when I dive Greenpeace put their RHIB between me and other boats.

I'm not fat but when the R101 was salvaged the outside skin was used to make me a drysuit.
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Old 30-04-08, 07:01 AM
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I'm not fat but when I go for a dive people ask if I'm the real Moby...or just any old dick.
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Old 30-04-08, 07:30 AM
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I'm not saying I'm fat. But when i go on holiday they have to re-calculate the tides......

Simon A
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Old 30-04-08, 09:19 AM
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I'm not saying I'm fat but my last boyfriend couldn't get over me. He had to get up and go round.
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Old 30-04-08, 10:03 AM
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I'm not saying I'm fat, but remember that tsunami .... ?
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Old 30-04-08, 10:05 AM
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I'm not saying I'm fat but last summer we used my drysuit as an emergency marquee
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Old 30-04-08, 10:06 AM
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Is Tommy Cooperesque subversion allowed?
I dont say I'm fat, but my mum does.

I'm not fat, but my glands are.

I'm not saying I've got a fat c0ck, but I have.
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Old 30-04-08, 10:15 AM
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Talking
I'm not fat, just contently rotund.

I'm only fat compared to malnourished or anorexic people.

If people say I'm fat, I say "I may be, but you'll wake in the morning still as ugly as you are now!"

My wife loves me the way I am, she says I'm like Adonnis, or was it ADonut!
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Last edited by Gram43 : 30-04-08 at 10:21 AM.
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Old 30-04-08, 10:37 AM
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purple vonny purple vonny is online now
adsum
  
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purple vonny was born with gillspurple vonny was born with gillspurple vonny was born with gillspurple vonny was born with gillspurple vonny was born with gillspurple vonny was born with gillspurple vonny was born with gillspurple vonny was born with gillspurple vonny was born with gillspurple vonny was born with gillspurple vonny was born with gills
I'm not saying I'm fat but when I was on the beach, Greenpeace dragged me back in the water
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