TGIF - SS Cuvier Dive, and what a dive

[Diving Dude]

There l was at work yesterday not really looking forward to this dive, l was expecting it to be much colder, the sea a lot rougher, crappy vis and a bunch of kn*bs (and a girlie) on the boat.

How wrong could l be, except for the last bit, what a superb day, l still can't believe how good the vis was for Dover in March

Thanks to Junior for bringing the do-nuts and thanks to Paul for donating his last one to me

This time l didn't forget anything and the Lurve box worked perfectly....well apart from one handset displaying low battery and bleeping occasionally even though it definitely doesn't have a low battery, a common fault according to AP and one which should be sorted out when l send the head back....oh and a handset cutting out for no reason and the HUD flashing red lights which bore no resemblance to the cell readings apart form that it all worked ok.

l am really looking forward to the Easter gig now, there are still spaces if anyone's interested.

[Diving Dude]

Originally Posted by Paul Oliver

.....Well The Dude, Howard Junior and Rob all do Dognuts

That's a beer and some bowls in Robs hand not a donut.

[Paul Oliver]

Originally Posted by Diving Dude

That's a beer and some bowls in Robs hand not a donut.

Yup, i think he stuffed the donut in his gob in one go once he noticed you back on the boat

[Diving Dude]

Because l didn't take a hat with me, Chunderfish lent me one of hers. l did wonder at the time why she was wearing two hats, but hey ho she's from Norfolk and they do strange thinks up there.

l've only just twigged that she gave me her 'sick' hat.
Not the one she chucked up into last time but a spare to be sick into.

Or maybe she was going to be sick into a double woolly hat to avoid seepage.

EDIT Or maybe her hubby makes her wear two big woolly hats to pull down to cover her face whist bumping naughties and we all know that there should be two in case one comes off

[Paul Oliver]

We even had the extra excitement of a runaway lightship as the East Goodwin Lightship had disappeared

As we were heading back we could see one of the local tugs towing it back onto station.

[Paul Oliver]

I've just realised as well the 2 dives we have done this year with excellent viz had Chunderfish on the boat both times, so maybe Dianne is the Good Viz Charm

Hmmm as she has started picking up pikey habits like borrowing deco stages, SPG's and gas maybe she will start selling lucky heather on future dives

[Janos]

What a brilliant day!

Short version:
Borrow torch from Mark.
Take piss out of Howard
Surprised by excellent viz
Stay down for a good while
Come back up
All the doughnuts have gone.
Thanks to Paul for organising the trip, and Howard for not f'in up like he usually does.

Long version:

For me, UK diving is about the sheer unexpectedness of it all. Booking on a dive in winter (and it's been a long poor winter in 2006-07) is always going to be risky, but occasionally it pays off and today was one of those days.

After a leisurely lie in I wandered down to Dover, stoppin en route to see the lovely Mark Chase who had kindly agreed to lend me his spare HID while mine was being repaired (damaged cable = flooded battery). Once again I was struck by the friendliness of YD-ers. It's nice that we help each other out like this . Send him your green love everyone.

Anyway, while at Chasey's we talked about the dive. The reason he'd had to cancel was that it was his eleventh wedding anniversary and he was taking his missus out for some posh grub.

Although he was obviously disappointed by missing the dive, he wasn't too disappointed. It's been a crap winter and the viz was pants when we dived out of Dover a couple of weeks ago and cacky pants two weeks before that. Naturally our expectation was that it was going to be poor viz. But would it be pants, or cacky pants?

Anyway, down at Dover Marina the weather was glorious winter sunshine. However it wasn't due to last. Looking west a new front was coming in, as predicted by the guys at the bureau. A quick conference between the Skipper and Paul and a few other sage heads on board and we decided to do the SS Cuvier, which is this side of the channel, rather than the planned HMS Hermes on the other side. Paul checked that everyone on board was happy with the new plan, which we were, so the Cuvier it was.

The ride out was beautiful. Dave's boat certainly has a bit of poke around it, and the cabin is big enough for everyone that wants to go in there. Howard's son, "Junior" had kindly brought a tray of 12 Krispy Kreme doughnuts with him and I deviated enough from the Janos 2007 project [1] to enjoy their sweet goodness. Mmmmmmm.

It was a pleasure to catch up again with Dianne and Mark (Gizmo) who I hadn't seen for a while. And of course take the piss out of the Dude behind his back. One of the wrecks out of Dover is known as the "lead wreck" because it is full of lead blocks, and well the jokes are obvious.

But I digress. On site and the water is a darkish blue. Still a little hint of green about it but it's not looking bad. Dave has managed to do it again and find the viz.

I get ready and move out of the way to let Gizmo kit up. Then I wait for the Dude. My stage is hanging down and feeling heavy. The Dude struggles with a clip. A couple of people help him into his kit. Then a couple more surround him fiddling with this and that. Hot, and perspiring slightly, it's like courtiers fussing over a senile Queen Victoria. I overhear snatches of conversation "Should this regulator be detatched from your bailout bottle?" "Most people dive with the zip done fully up" "Wait you pikey git you've forgotton your fins!"
Finally with an almighty heave, those four kind souls lift the Dude from the deck. Now looking more like a Queen Termite than Queen Victoria, he ponderously makes his way to the waters edge. A brief pause, and then SPLASH. He is in.

I get in too.

Down the shot line and I realise that my torch has been threaded through my waist strap. With a bit of help from Howard it's sorted out, and a couple of people overtake us on the shot. We descend a bit further and at 20m I can see they've just stopped. "Jesus" I think to myself. "Why have they stopped?" Then I realise that they're on the wreck. At 30m. And we're still at 22m. Brilliant!

The wreck is laid out in front of us. I start reeling off, but then realise that there's no need. I consider dropping the reel but decide to carry on. We swim towards the stern section first of all. There's a corridor on the starboard side with the rood missing, so it's really easy to swim along there, reeling off, and looking into the cabins on each side.

I find a lobster, and almost manage to get him. I think a better hunter than me would have been successfull. But he lives to fight another day. We swim on for a while, before coming into the holds in 38m which are full of china (stamped maestrict) and bottles and stuff. I find a couple of nice chamber pots which will make rather nice plant pots. Further on there are some handpainted little bowls in a hold in 40m. I drop down through the wreck and see that although the packing cases have rotted away, the straw between the bowls is still there. Swimming further in, we can see divers above us through the wooden decking. It's brilliant. The viz is a good 8m to 10m (yes really) and I am as happy as a pig in mud.

The dude and I swap over reeling in and out duties for a bit. But reely (aha!) there is no need. The ship is very shipshape and as we approach the stern we see the Cuvier's gentle curving backside. We drop down to have a look at the missing prop, and then see Paul Oliver and Gizmo making their way towards the stern. I give Paul a round of applause for choosing an excellent day.

Drifting with the tideback to the shot we reel in. When we get there a couple of divers are making the way up the shot. The Dude and I decide to enact plan C. On the way out we had made three plans for the dive. Plan A was a 45 minute bottom time if it was good viz. Plan B was a 30min bottom time if it
was pants viz. Plan C was the "f'me this is excellent!" scenario in which case we would stay down a bit longer.

F'me but the dive was excellent so stay down longer we did. This time we went to the bow. There was a fair bit of interesting stuff to see down there, but sadly we didn't have time to stop and look at it as the tide was beginning to run. There was a fair few tackle blocks and other bits of winching equipment around through. We almost made it to the bow, except I think the bow is probably several miles away on the Cuvier. Getting to the front of the wreck it just stops - presumably the bow sheared off in the collision that sank her. We rewind our reel and make it back to the shot. Unclipping the reel we start up back to the surface, pausing at 21m and then doing a minute or two every 3m all the way back to 9m, where we stop a bit longer. I relax out on my homemade jon-line and look at the four divers up at 6m.

By the time we're at 6m, there are just two divers left, so it's crowded, but not too bad. They go leaving me and the Dude to hang around at 6m. I hate shotline deco, and by the end of it the current is so strong that my balls are being squashed by by crotchstrap and I've cramp in my leg that I can't strech out as the current won't let me put my fins perpendicular to the current. And my hands get a little cold. But it's worth it. Oh boy was it worth it.

Eventually the deco is finished and we get back on board. Apparently there was another tray of donuts but I didn't see any. Probably a good thing for the Janos 2007 project.

It's smiles all round and it seems that everyone had a good dive. That was great as it would have been a shame if someone had missed the a dive in such excellent viz because of equipment problems (or indeed an anniversary ). We pull the shot and head back to Dover.

It's definitely starting to blow up as we head back. The sea isn't too bad but there's a strong wind coming from the west and someone's twinset takes a tumble. Fortunately nothing was damaged.

Back in the harbour it's a hard climb for the Grandude, but the sprightly young virile men on the trip have no problem springing up the steps. A quick chat in the carpark and then it's time for home.

All in all it's been a brilliant day. A great bunch of people. Clear skies. Excellent viz. A lovely wreck. What more do you want?

Thanks go to all on board, Dave for being an excellent skipper and finding the viz. Chasey for the loan of the torch, the Dude for diving with me, and most of all to Paul for organising a fab day out.

Janos

[1] - I've lost a stone already this year using my patented "eat less, exercise more" diet.

[Mark Chase]

4What Janos didn't tell you was as he was leaving my place Ling said, Why isn't mark going with you? I pointed out the late get back time and she said Thats all right darling you could have gone.

Women are just evil

As it turned out i have the Russian death flu anyway so I suppose i shouldn't feel too bad. I am coughing so hard I probably would have spat the loop out and flooded it

ATB

Mark Chase

[Madfish]

What an abfab day..............I was certain that (for me) the day wasn't going to happen , but in the event, the kit loaners & menders, weather & plan all came good..........

The highlights - everything really - top craic all day........

Lowlights - looking up the DCI staircase, from the bottom.....

.........and being referred to in the public domain as a two-hat job by Dude!! (well, I suppose I was looking a bit tatty by the end......)

The medals list is too long but esp to Paul O, Old Dud and my lucky BoTD Howard (Homar) Payne........

Dianne

[501diver]

Always a pleasure to have a good collection of YD's. Thanks guys you made it a good day out and the plan came together. Paul knows what he's doing, honestly.

Trust me the viz gets better on that site. Roll on the summer, I think it starts in 2 weeks time.

Brian
(DO Folkestone 501 Divers)
Anchor slave Neptune