Kinky Divers do Dover

[divegyrl]

Well the first Kinky Divers trip happened last weekend in Dover. We were diving off Taurus with Andy and good weather had been ordered!

On Saturday morning bright and early we met Mark Chase, Alan (Getafix), Jeremy, Simon (Padowan) Declan, Spike & Claire, Digger & Illy. Our leave time was 7.50am and Juz and I were glad we had stayed with Illy in Folkestone on Friday night!

Lots of introductions, some tea and coffee later, sweeties for the skipper and we dropped ropes and headed off when the skipper was “good and ready”!
We headed off to the New Comet, published depth was 35m, Juz had found a 47m scour on it the last time we dived it, so with that in mind Illy, Juz and myself dropped in as a 3!
Viz was in the 10m range, water was a balmy 17 degrees (Juz & I were diving without hood or gloves) and swarming with life! There were giant crabs and massive lobsters everywhere! Mark managed to bag a fine specimen for tea, but discovered during his extra 40mins of deco stops (Digger’s LDS had no O2, so no accelerated deco for THAT young man!) his tea escaped! Top Man Mark for hanging around with Digger! We found a massive prop, and although I didn’t drop to the seabed, I managed to get 41.9m near the bottom! Thanks to Alan & Jeremy for sending up the lucky grapple! Back on board & the chocolates came out, & disappeared along with welcome tea and coffees.

Back to port, and we were met by the Taurus crew, young Stephen and Jamie in their “Taurus Diving” boiler suits (so adorable those boys!) and Andy’s compressor was put to work pumping cylinders for the afternoon dive. Juz & I drove Illy to Folkestone to have his twin 7’s & 3L stage pumped at his club compressor, whilst we set up our baby compressor outside the yacht club and topped our cylinders.

No time for lunch, so back to Dover Marina to head off for the afternoon dive, the sun was shining, the sea had flattened out and there was a fishing boat sitting over the wreck! Now, we had planned to dive the Pomerania, so our plan changed to the Lariston (although everyone thought it was called something different), in as a 3 again (well we ARE Kinky Divers) Juz had sticky ears so took a little longer to get down the shot and when he arrived we filled the lift bag and sent up the grapple again!

Viz was again in the 5-8m range and this wreck was again covered in life! More crabs, lobsters and even a conger in the pipes. Juz had found a bottle so was carrying it along until he spied a porthole! Much stroking and prodding and pushing later (& lots of giggling from me) I called time & we headed back up to complete our deco sans porthole! We still haven’t decided what the wreck was for sure!

Mark and Digger had brought back 2 lobsters, one of which Mark caught trying to escape during a deco stop; apparently Mr John Thomas Moon (that’s Digger to you and I) esquire is rather frightened of lobsters!

Now in Dover there is a Greek Taverna, in that Taverna there are belly dancers, Bazooka players & the one & only Elvis Presleyopodous! It seemed that a tradition had to be continued so we were joined by Avril (Illy’s other half) Jo & the boys for a night of good food and suspect entertainment! The belly dancer turned out to be male (Digger didn’t seem to mind) and then Dover Regatta lay on fireworks! Midnight very quickly approached and we all headed home. Illy and Avril had offered Spike & Claire their other spare room, so we all climbed into my beast and headed back for Folkestone!

Sunday dawned, much too early for some, (Digger had got up at 5am with Andy, decided his watch was broken and crawled back into the bunk until 8.15!) We all met back at the Marina, Chris (Digs), Svjena, Libby & Stuart (TX101) took up the spaces vacated by Mark, Alan & Jeremy. The compressor was working hard in the lovely box built by Digger, Padowan & Andy the previous day, the sun was shining and we headed off for the Varne Bank Wreck, we got to the Varne lightship, wondered about the man operating the horn, split into our groups Juz went in as a 3 with TX101 & Digger, but Libby got the best deal with Padowan & Declan!

Illy and I were last in as we were sending up the grapple. We got down, there was the grapple, there was the seabed, there were millions of hermit crabs and anemones and there was no wreck! We sent up the lift bag and the “not so lucky grapple”! The viz was perfect, 10m at least but not a piece of wreck, or crockery or even other divers to be seen! After a quick search, we gave up and headed back up. Illy’s VR3 decided to reset itself to 29th September 96 and air so we came up slowly using his Vyper as his run plan!

Back on board and no-one had found the wreck, the sun had disappeared and we headed back for Dover. Svjena brought the most wonderful chocolate muffins which considerably brightened our day!

Declan & Stuart headed off home (not together!) and we went to The Churchill for lunch. The staff had a personality transplant and a severe lack of humour, we waited 40mins for lunch and they even forgot some of it! But our enthusiasm could not be dampened and we headed back to the boat where we were joined by Don, one of Illy’s club mates.

We had decided to dive the Loanda, a gentle 20m, close to port as our final dive of the weekend, Juz was on a mission to prove he could fill the lift bag with just his exhaust gas (in 7 breaths, which in fact he managed to do in 4) to lift the grapple and Digger was tasked with counting! I went in as a 3 again this time with Illy and Don and dropped onto a wreck covered in lots of broken glass bottles, clay pipes, buttons, beads, crabs, lobsters & blennies!

Both Juz & Digger discovered their fear of lobsters, apparently screaming like girls when trying to capture one for my tea!

Libby came up with the most enormous grin after her dive (what were you doing young Padowan?) Claire & Spike found a gin bottle (we know what “gin clear viz” is now based on!) it stank! They also found pipes and beads, Juz brought up the wooden side of a ginger ale crate & a bottom of a pot with “Hamlet” on it. Digger found some beautiful perfume bottles and Don brought up a pipe with a face carved on it! The sun had come out again, the chocolate was opened and devoured and we headed back to shore!

The highlights:
Digger “if it was a tight enough hole I would do it”
Mark Chase for the amazing rugby tackle on the escaping lobster during his deco stop
Mark for the extra stops with Digger!
Svjena for those muffins!
Illy and Avril for extending their hospitality
Libby for that smile after the second dive
Stevie & Jamie, Taurus Crew extraordinaire!
Andy’s compressor! It survived all the demands put on it!
Male belly dancer??

In fact a great big thank-you to everyone on this trip who got up at silly o'clock and who helped make this weekend a great success!

Blanaid

[TX101]

great report.. looks like I missed a good dive in the afternoon! But in the end I'm glad I went home when I did as I was falling asleep at the wheel as it was - as well as feeling like shite from being seasick..

Note to self: Next time, don't wait until 1am to go to bed if you have to get up at 5am!

[Padowan]

Was a top weekend out - good to put some faces to names, and get some good diving in. The conditions out of Dover have been excellent these last couple of weeks.

Does seem that the computer fairy was having a bit of a laugh at our expense though, as not only did we have Illy's "reboot" mid dive, but we had Diggers magical 37m 0min dive logged on the Loanda, and my VR3 deciding that I should do a 14m microbubble stop, AFTER it had cleared the 6m stop?

I think that the grin on Libbys face could have been caused by my demonstration of a new "experimental" deco hang technique, of clipping my reel to my butt-ring and just dangling there. Actually, it works quite well...

Digger: Juz and I are waiting for the "we're right, you're wrong" discussion thread to start...

And I still think that is would be cool if the foghorn of the Lightship could be re-programmed to toot out the Nokia ring tone!!

[divegyrl]

I had forgotten the "curse of the Loanda" and the computers!
How could I forget your butt ring! I had caught my finger in your (stage) ring earlier, or was that someone else?

Does anyone know if Digger has gotten up yet?

Blanaid

[Andy the Coastie]

NO, hope of that today Simon...............

bet ya the LAZY TWAT is flat on his back pushing out the zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzz 's

[CotoChris]

Great report, brings me a smile visulaising the fun you had. Glad to have gone at Easter placing names to faces and having a good time overall. The Greek Taverna had great rooms but then the Belly Dancer was female, at least she looked like one.

Incidentally when going to UK two weeks ago stayed at the Greek overnight with my Mrs and had to put up not only with the belly dancing but the Elvis act! It was good to stop by and say hi to Andy the week earlier. So he's now have a compressor, great news!

[divegyrl]

I got a pm from Digger, he is home; safe & truly rested!

Some good photos downloaded, Juz will post them tomorrow......... I'm sure there were other camera's on board. where are the pics?

Andy is a rather splendid camera man! Another string to his bow!

Roll on the next Kinky Divers trip!

Blanaid

[Diving Dude]

Glad you had a good time Blanaid.
In your report, you even managed to hide your disssapointment that l wasn't there.
This was a "family stuff" weekend for me, so l couldn't come, wish l had now............... Elvis the greek............................ Easter weekend........ that was a laugh.

Still friday beckons, Andy get the do-nuts in.

[louigi]

wish I had been there but just a bit busy at the mo will try to get down before the seasons end. Me and the other two divateers,
" (baby bird and Fu king diver)", see you all soon Lou.

[Andy the Coastie]

Well, my weekend started when Digger rang me on friday night saying " Hi ya, i'm 1 & 1/2 hours away. meet ya at the garage 22:30 ". NOW both my boys were up, and started to get excited as the Dive God was on his way to THIER house,,,,,,,,, took us over an hour to get them to sleep as they had a busy day ahead on the Saturday. Had to get Digger to sleep aswell as it got late and WE ALL KNOW he hates early starts.

Took 15 minutes to get Digger up so i could get to the boat to get prepared for what was a well planned weekend on Blain's and Juz's part, jezzz even the sun was shining, once the sea mist hate lifted.

Was great to see faces new and old, everyone was smiling , chatting and slupping a well deserved cuppa. [ insert ] Blain's dive report here [ /insert ]

At the end of the day, Simon - Digger - the young crew installed the compressor under my beady eye, and started pumping, we had a few sets to do by 2000, so that we could do the KINKY DIVERS greek night, now this was wierd, KINKY DIVERS do Dover and we do the Greek thing, the belly dancer is a man ( made my kids laugh when they could see for themselves ).
The boys think that the divers are cool, coz they let them come with them to the pub and are treated like divers although DAD is the best diver in the world. ((( Had to remind Digger, that i was a Diver when he was still in liquid form ))). left the Greeky for home around 0030, Digger fell alseep after watching TOP OF THE POPS.

Early start for me, was up and about at 0430 as i needed to leave home for 0500 to fill the rest of the twin's. Took me a whole 30 minutes to get Digger vertical.
" it's 5 o'clock, why did my watch stop ? ".... god that boy has led a sheltered life. Got in the car and drove to the boat, sun was out, sea was flat. I said " this is the best part of the day ", " Is it **** " was his reply.

Simon has worked out that it was gonna take 3 hours to pump 4 twins and 1 15.. so Digger and I was gonna take shifts until the others arrived,,,,,,, but Digger found the BUNK on the Taurus and decided that he needed a lie down, the boat was going to leave at 0915 OR when i'm ****ing god damm good and ready . Digger of course woke up when the engines started, and his face was a piccie when he met Svenja , who he worked with years back in Cyprus.

The first dive didn't go to plan,,,,,,, but no-one spat the dummy out, but was the turning point in a mass event of discussion on kit config's and slagging people down , Simon knocked another day off until his course Cakes and TREATS came out on deck,,,,,,,, and I had my pack of jelly sweets.

Loanda was a cracking dive, seeing run times go well over the hour, which is excellent... Spike and Claire went in first in a bit of tide, which myself and some of the others thought ' **** that '........ was good to see the pair of them experience a weekend of good Viz and dives here at Dover, as the last trip they were on was a crappy weekend of viz.

Anyway , I had fun and it was a pleasure to make sure all the divers were happy and well entertained, and i can't wait for the next trip,,,,,,,((( DIVE DUDE , your name was mentioned a bit, so you better get booked on the next trip ))).

Note today i had a fishing charter and was out on the Varne wreck, a local RIB that does this nearly every dive they do , spent 45 mins trying to get the shot into it, and gave up and did another close by .