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Fathers dilema

2K views 30 replies 18 participants last post by  Allan Carr 
#1 ·
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Hi All,
Just got a text from my ex wife who is on holiday in Lazarote with my 8 year old son.She informed me she has booked him up for a bubblemaker course on wednesday.I have always told my son he is too young and would have to wait until he is older ,they both enjoy snorkling and i have bought him his own kit and suit for holidays he has also taken interest in my diving and come on a few trips.I still feel he is to young but do not want to be the big bad father as i know it would up set him after his mothers said yes.I feel very frustrated as i always thought that if my son ever started to dive i would be there to watch over him and the instructor, who i do not know or even which resort/centre he would be diving with.From my sons point of veiw i know he wants to dive because that is what his father does and enjoys.
Does any one have experience of the bubblemaker course or can offer a few gems of widom to put me out of my suffering and torment.

Regards,

MAL..  
 
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#2 ·
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Hi Mal,

I'm sure you will get a few answers on this,  especially about young children and starting too early.  

The bubblemaker course is confined water and 6ft or 2m max depth.  Personally it would not concern me but ultimately it is your decision, but I would be more concerned about him enjoying it too much and the financial burden this would place on you later on  


I can email you some information on the bubblemaker program if it is useful for you to make an informed decision.

Daz
 
#6 ·
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Thank for the replies the minimum age is 8 but i think my biggest frustration is not being there and if i said no she would probably take him anyway (thats why she's an ex wife  
) Oh well afew sleepless night ahead and i think i will start drinking stella when she gets back
.

Thanks Daz for the 2 m depth i could not find that info and that does not seem to bad and i presume it is in a pool,even though i think he is still to young.

Regards,

MAL..
 
#7 ·
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<font color='#000080'>Let him go. We used to have hundreds of kids doing it, and the centres know who is best working with them, and there will be plenty of others doing it.

8 seems young, but I've had 8 year-olds in the water that were far better than their mum/dad. They will take to it, and the programme is designed for the little ones. No complicated what everything does, no theory really, just "keep this in your mouth, this is how to equalise, any problems give me this signal."

As a guide we used to take them out in water up to my waist. Centres know what is sensible, and know that the shallower the water, the less questions you get off parents. Other thing is it may well be in the pool, in which case you're as safe as houses. Really.

If you're worried about the cost, just bear in mind they can't do a course or anything til they're 10, and even then you can do the Scuba Diver, then the OW, then the AOW every year. Compared to most of the costs of having kids I reckon it won't cost you a great deal.

Only warning I have is make sure it is a PADI centre teaching a PADI course "The Bubblemaker Program" and that all the forms are properly filled in, including a different form than the others who may be doing Discover Scuba etc. which is for anyone under 12? I think. If a centre is doing all of this, you're with the right people. And much better to go down there and check them out a few days before, as going along on the morning and pulling the kid out of it because you're not happy is a nightmare for kid and parent.
 
#9 ·
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<font color='#0000FF'>MAL,

I'm a father of 2 boys , 8 & 6 . I would let them both do the course and personally i would stay away , and just wait to see the little smiling faces and the ticket of completion.
I would even go as far as letting Digger being the instructor,,,,,, why you ask ?

Someone like Digger ( and only have just met him ) has a flair for chatting to kids in their language and also being funny,,,,,,, BUT his knowledge of diving , his beady eye would be on the kids every move to be kept in safe hands.
My 2 boys met Digger over this weekend , and although we had a KFC together, my kids told their teacher about Digger being left in the water for a longtime from our boat, and Digger was really funny. ( Their DIVE GOD , now ).    Now wouldn't you like your boy to come home from his holiday, saying how wonderful his DIVING INSTRUCTOR , i know from your side of it, YES , i would love to see him doing the course, but thats life .

Andy .

ref the money ,,,,,,,,,, i would prefer to spend my money helping my boys though life enjoying themsleves rather then them nicking money out my wallet to fund a drug habit. ( On tele today , a 9 year old girl nicking from mothers purse and pub till to fund her canibis habit ).
 
#10 ·
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<font color='#000080'>Andy, are you being nice to me this week caue we found that gold, or do you fancy me?


And if you want me to teach the boys, it'll cost you. I need my comedy twin. We used to do an absolute Morecambe and Wise every bloody morning. Me and Dan, out of our minds. After 4 hours sleep. But safety is always number one, especially with the little ones.

And chatting to kids in their language is easy. That's the only language I got! Intelligent kid of age 6 can outwit me any day. Well, the intelligent kid age 8 had me tying up the boat...
 
#12 ·
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Dear Mal

all these well meant posts, and all of it correct, as well. I fear, though, that they are missing the point. Your point is that YOU wanted to introduce him to the thing you love, and be there. You had told him that he was too young, and here is his mum doing it for him, out of your reach, so to speak...

Well..calm down. I know it is frustrating, but you can always tell him that YOU will then be responsible for booking his actual diving courses, and then be there for him. Just be ready to go when he starts "real" scuba diving. This way, both his parents are involved in it, which is a good thing for HIM, and HE is the main actor in this show.

But yeah, I can imagine it galls (it would me!).

moray
 
#13 ·
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Hi,

I've done this with my boy and others, who also happens to be 8 a few times and they either love it or hate it.

I would have no fears about the danger or any of the other scare's that people put forward. All it involves is a bit of this is what a reg does (dunk your head), this is how we go up and down (play with BC). Once they are comfortable we just swim up and down, a hand stand and an egg (ping pong ball) and spoon race. Made all the funnier because you have to use the spoon upside down.

It is all great fun and carried out at a max depth of a swimming pool.

Have no fears, other than the fact that next time he is with you, the fact that you dive will mean that he will bug the cr*p out of you to go with him and do it again and again and again and again. If you get the chance, do it, it is a fantastic experience for them to join in with your hobby in a safe, controlled enviroment.

All the best,

Andrew

p.s. I just read Moray's post, as far as you may be concerned, a bit of me agrees, I suffer from x-wife syndrome also. But, thie thing that stopped me from being too upset was when the boy told me he took up rugby because he knew it was what daddy used to do when he was "my" age. It doesn't seem like much now, but find a bubblemakers over here and go in with him,
 
#14 ·
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Mal

Both my kids have done a `Bubblemaker`, although they were a couple of years older. I think your biggest problem is that you won`t be there to enjoy watching your son actually listening attentively to someone. Kids have minds like sponges and he`ll readily adapt to the environment.

If he likes it, and when he gets back, you can always book him in on another one. An Instructor at my local club charges a tenner. It`s the best hours enjoyment you`ll have in a long while.

Steve
 
#16 ·
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<font color='#000080'>I want to do a bubble maker! We never got egg and spoon with me! Bastards! All I did was swimming up and down and forward rolls! OK, I was 12, but I'm playing egg and spoon next pool night I get.

There could be a record. 25m pool. One teaspoon, one ping-pong ball. Brilliant.
 
#17 ·
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Thanks all for your thoughts much appreciated.
Moray you are right about me not being there but i just found out that she is going to have a go herself which makes me alot happier than trusting him on his own to some unkown instructor.
But on the good side if he does get into diving i can now blame it on the ex and expect her to pay half  


Regards,

MAL..
 
#18 ·
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[b said:
Quote[/b] (Steve L. @ Jan. 26 2004,19:53)]Daz

As a present, do you want Neil and I to  book you in on a `Bubblemaker` for your birthday ?

Steve
 
 


Well I would say yes, but then I read the course standards and the thought of a whole 2 metres of depth, scares me  


Anyway, what are you and Neill all of a sudden?  My adoptive parents?  Now theres a scary thought.

Mal,

I am sure you would have loved to be there for his first time in, but you can as people have pointed out, always take him in for a bubblemaker in the UK when he gets back.  I suspect, once will not be enough?

There is also a PADI program called the PADI seal team, min age 8.  Normally the "Seal Team" would meet regurlarly and play different games and explore different experiences whilst supervised.  They usually run as a regular fun club.

Do a bit of hunting around and see what is available,  

Daz
 
#19 ·
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[b said:
Quote[/b] (GUV.. @ Jan. 26 2004,22:08)]But on the good side if he does get into diving i can now blame it on the ex and expect her to pay half  


Regards,

MAL..
NOW you are thinking! *grin*

moray
 
#21 ·
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I'm looking forward to the same with my lil girl when she is old enough (a long way off).

I would say, if he has been promised it already then sit back and look forward to the same when he gets home (and ideally make the SEAL team a regular outing).

If not, then you could consider telling the ex how important it is to find the right place to do it, if she has found a good place then you can relax about that, if not then she may want to postpone it herself until you are available to do it with him.

Don't forget to welcome the little fella to our world on behalf of Yorkshire Divers (you could see if they do wee YD polo shirts
)

Hope you enjoy it, whatever the outcome

Conor
 
#22 ·
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<font color='#000080'>Mal,

I kinda know what you are going through. I separated from my wife about 4 years ago and she took the kids back to Plymouth, which is quite a distance from Essex! My son is now 12 and daughter almost 10, my son is more interested in computer games/skateboarding/snowboarding than diving but my daughter is a real water baby and loves me talking about it. She asked to do a try dive last year on holiday and to see her pay so much attention to the instructor and use what he said made me feel extremely proud. She even managed to recover her reg after a kid kicked it out. She is really looking forward to Malta this year!! Even picked out her wetsuit!

What I'm getting at is although you may not be able to be with your son this time, next time you have him, arrange with a local agency to do it again, this time with you watching him. You will both get a major kick out of it. Believe me. Then it's the first dive together - that's what I'm REALLY looking forward to.

Anyway, my girlfriend is now converted, my daughter loves it, only my son to go..

All the best,

Ian
 
#23 ·
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Please let everyone know how he gets on,i've two money nuggets (6 & 8 ) as well and they would like to try the bubble maker system please state which resort/dive shop they use? IF CALYPSO YOUR OK  a real sound bunch a beauty called annette whos blonde but thats another story, the trouble is its hard been a dad, mine tried rock climbing this week it was me who  was shaking not them
just let him crack on

afterall you have given him the inspiration no one else



 
 
 
 
#25 ·
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Thanks all for your posts very much appreciated.
As an up date my son did his first dive yesterday, the ex bottled as she reckoned it was too cold. I was told he jumped straight down and did not come up for 15 minutes when the instructer had to drag him out.I am still bursting with pride today but still wish i could have been there.Then in the evening he went to the hotel disco to chat up all the dive groupies, that,s my boy


Thanks again for everyones kind words.

Regards,

MAL..
 
#26 ·
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I allowed my daughter to do Junior Open Water a few months back, she is 10 years old and this is the minimum age with PADI. We live on Phuket, Thailand and I dive a lot on my own or teaching courses (OWSI). My daughter is now extremely frustrated by the 12m limit and I get endless earache about not taking her to any other sites, all of which are too deep for her. With hindsight I would have waited until she was older avoiding both her frustration and the number of appeasment beach dives I have to make.

Ian
 
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