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Just not enough dive time.
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Now do I have everyones attention,
good, anybody see the thing last night on the TV about the Loch Ness monster, what did we all think of a) his technique and b) his kit?

Matt
ps I dont really hate Mark  
 

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Finless: You couldn't invent him...
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I saw a little bit of it, but fell asleep.

Has the "bubble helmet" been developed so that it can go deeper than the (I think) 18 mtr limit that it previously had.

If you can get down to 50 mtrs with one I wouldn't miind having ago - so long as there was some way to scratch my nose.
 

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[b said:
Quote[/b] (MATTBIN @ July 28 2003,17:21)]Now do I have everyones attention,
good, anybody see the thing last night on the TV about the Loch Ness monster, what did we all think of a) his technique and b) his kit?

Matt
ps I dont really hate Mark  
Sorry Matt missed it but I am stunned,  so not only have they proved his existence but he was wearing kit as well...

So come on tell those of us who missed it,  was he using twins a single, did he go for a hog loop configuration.  


And what exactly was his technique like,  I am guessing those big front flippers have got to be an advantage, did he use tail weights for trim ??

I am all intrigued now, gutted I missed it.

Daz  


P.S   I hate Mark as well.....  Umm OK I don't really but it's a bandwagon kind of thing.  
 

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Just not enough dive time.
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No you knob, the presenter, not the bloody fish thing.
The prog sort of proved it/he/she cant exist as the need for breathe would mean constant surfacing and being spotted.
But all in it wasnt bad, the underwater scenes were crap though. They also disclosed that at least one of the 50's photos was a fake. So I'm afraid it looks like Nessie doesnt exist and if it did its probably long dead.
One bit of info though was that the Loch is 39Km long 200 odd mtrs deep and could swallow the Earth's popuation three time over, so there's a few gallons in there, or should that be litres. Stunning scenery too.

Matt
 

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[b said:
Quote[/b] (MATTBIN @ July 28 2003,17:35)]The prog sort of proved it/he/she cant exist as the need for breathe would mean constant surfacing and being spotted.
Well no not really like I said it depends on his kit, a rebreather should give him good duration but I would have expected the local compressor operators noticing a dinosaur walking in for a refill.

Oh I see the presenter....
 

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What the vast majority of these progs fail to tell you (I didn't see the one in question so excuse me if I'm teaching you to suck eggs here) is that there is naff-all life in Loch Ness.  I.e. Nessie has to survive on idiot film producers. Not much of a diet, and if they're diving RBs the Sofnolime'll give him(her) catastrophic flatulence.
 

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Bizarrely they actually used the example of similar creatures who lived in Arctic (Antarctic? - sorry I wasn't paying it my undiveded attention either) to prove it could live in the cold waters and metioned that the reason these things went to cold waters was because of all the food - a plankton soup creating a feast of a food chain.

The actual conclusion was that it all started becuase impressionable fifties audiences saw King Kong and started imagining the monster of the deep...

Lou

p.s  I am going to boil Mark alive as instructed by the LLF (lobster liberation front) and the the Brothers of Crab
 

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Could Nessie be a bottom-feeder..? Must be lots of nutrients in the mud...
 

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Just not enough dive time.
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Food wasnt the issue, it was agreed that the poor thing would need to be mobile to stay warm (as its a reptile) and being stationary would mean certain death. Apparently turtles do the same thing, so to generate heat it must breathe, frequently, thus plenty of opportunity to see Nessie surface for air. No sightings means no Nessie.

Matt
 

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That's assuming it's an air-breather...
 

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But food is an issue - they didn't cover it, but Rob said there was sod all in Loch Ness.  Those bleeders on the programme ate big fish and things.  If there ain't no big fish they can swim around keeping warm for ever, invent the snorkel to avoid being seen whilst breathing, but they are still gonna die of starvation.

Mind you, much as I don't believe in Nessie I would think two or three times before getting into Loch Ness!
 

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Just not enough dive time.
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OK lets do an experiment, We'll drop a diver into Loch Ness and see if he dies of starvation or asphyxiation first given that he's not allowed to lift his head out of the water and he hasnt got a snorkel. He hasnt got a snorkel and he cant invent one cos he's got a brain about the size of a walnut (similar to a croc, which they thought Nessie might be similar to as they have skeletal remains showing similarities of brain cavaty).
My money is on asphyxiation Lou.

Matt
 

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If nessie were a relative of the basking shark, the lack of fishes and of breathing air would be no problem at all...
 

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Just not enough dive time.
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But they 'proved' Nessie was a water based air breathing reptile that required movement to keep warm, probably gave birth to live young as opposed to eggs and was a fish eater due to the rows of ugly hampsteads in its moosh. So it needed fish and air.
Out of curiosity why is there 'sod all' in Loch Ness, is it environmentally dead? If so, why?

Matt
 

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[b said:
Quote[/b] ]But they 'proved' Nessie was a water based air breathing reptile
How?
To prove that, they'd have to prove it was real and examine it.
Besides, what about the Doctor Who explanation?
Loch Ness is connected to the sea underwater - Nessie hunts in the sea, but lives in the loch between feeding trips.
 

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Just not enough dive time.
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Along with Shergar, Elvis, Lord Lucan, Robert Maxwell and Walt Disney.
 

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But Matt, say they do come up to breathe and people just don't notice.  It is amazing what passes you by.  The scientific proof is not that folk don't see them, it is that a colony of creatures that size, and of the type they were talking about is unsustainable in Loch Ness.

After all no-one knows where the hell basking sharks go in the winter but we know they exist.

Besides all that the programme was bollox anyway!


And I really do hate this fashion for CGI "nature reconstructions".
 

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Just not enough dive time.
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Good point Lou, after all whenever you have a car accident there are no witnesses. But they experimented with a sunken stick that they could raise and it was clearly spotted by loads of tourists, in fact they all said it looked like Nessie, it was a straight fence post raised on a pulley system!

Absolutely agree there is no Nessie, still would dive the Loch though. Just in case.

Matt
 

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OK YD troop gig to the Loch to end this matter once and for all,  although I suspect after an evening on the sherry on the last night the number of sightings will increase substantially.  


Anyway after diving with Matt I'm not convinced that the site of a ugly monster looming out of the murk will phase me much  


Daz
 

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Finless: You couldn't invent him...
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It is an alien that comes to Loch Ness every now and then for a secluded holiday. Obviously the previous sightings were on its way back from the pub, after it had slipped out for a wee dram and when it was drunk and careless.

Mind you, I can't understand why it didn't flick the invisibility switch on its utility belt. Aliens, pah, they can be so stupid.

Scoff ye not. I know of what I talk. My avatar is in fact my true picture!
 
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