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Problem with cats in the garden?

861 views 18 replies 14 participants last post by  hogen-deifar 
#1 ·
#4 ·
Can I have one?

I'm sick of the bloody creatures cacking all over my garden, not nice to clear up - and it stinks. I usually have to get my OH to do it - I loose my stomach contents if I try. That would be superb - a guard tortoise!
 
#5 ·
That's great - I reckon my cat would 'ave it though. It's only 9 months old and managed to take down a squirrel the other day :eek:

I'm sick of the bloody creatures cacking all over my garden, not nice to clear up - and it stinks. I usually have to get my OH to do it - I loose my stomach contents if I try. That would be superb - a guard tortoise!
Foolproof solution - get your own cat :angel:
 
#7 ·
I am not going to make friends here but if you really want rid of them...

Have a nice fryup in with lots of grease in the frying pan.
Get some DRY cotton wool
Roll cotton wool around in grease
Place said cotton wool around garden
Cat eats cotton wool but since it's dry, it should expand internally
Cat die and problem goes away.

No need to thank me, and reds are added at the top right.

:D :D :D :D
 
#16 ·
Feed it epsom salts daily, it'll get chronic intestinal "difficulties" which the owners will get fed up with and the vets will be unable to explain and they'll eventually have it put down.

This public service announcement comes highly recommended by a pigeon fancier I know.



Sir has excellent taste, over/under is for Johnny Foreigner.

Cheers,

Stuart
 
#12 ·
i know a .22-250 rifle would work :D
 
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