Imported post
Some much opportunity; so little time! Yes, some very rich targets here old chap. I've only got a few minutes, so have a bag of these, Peter, and see what you think:
Scotland: Get it up ye! Sideways!
Scotland: Edinburgh and Glasgow: Half-rice-Half-chips?
Scotland: Better Ned than Dead!
[Variations on a theme]:
Scotland: Where even the Foie Gras is Deep Fried!
Scotland: Where the clothes are tie-dyed and the caviar deep-fried!
Scotland: 'Would you like salt, vinegar AND Private Health Care with that Deep Fried Everything sir?
Scotland: Boozers, Schmoozers and Losers!
Scotland: "Checking the Stats at Clatty-Pats!"
Scotland: More Hog than Manay
Scotland: "
Burns yer arse all this poetry lark, but..."
Scotland: We suck
less!
Scotland: I think therefore I am; You drink therefore you're a bam!
Scotland: Beirut with all the goods bits removed!
Scotland: Get well
oiled in Aberdeen
Scotland: More Nat King per mile than Natalie's Dad!
Scotland: I went there once, and it was shut!
Scotland: It's the Nads! Just ask mi Dad!
Scotland: We're not
Scotch: that's the drink, you dickhead!
Scotland: Aye, we've one or two wrecks!
Scotland: Excuse me, James, but at whom might you think you are looking? [Trad Arr: derived from the vernacular]
Scotland: The Krankies? Aye, course we knew them when they were a hardcore S&M act!
Scotland: Of course, you English still think 'James Hunt' is a racing car driver!
Scotland: Aye, very good.
Scotland: We don't want to yer toursim; now kindly fuck off......
Scotland: Get fired-in to it!
Scotland: Aye...yes...aye...yes......look! It's fuckin whisky! Stop eulogising it and just fuckin drink it!
Scotland: Sorry, I think you misheard me: when I said you were a 'doss c*nt', it didnay mean I liked ye!
Scotland: We're pure gash at footbaw, by the way.
Scotland: Perhaps our gene-pool needs a little chlorine?
Scotland: Gonni stop doon that??
Scotland: I didnay say "I'm goin fer some 'brekkie'": I said, "I'm goin fer some 'Buckie'!"
Scotland: I didnay say "We're at home to Sweden the night": I said, "You're doon my fuckin heed in the night!"
Scotland: I didnay say " I don't like Papists": I said, "I'm sweating like a rapist!"
Scotland: I didnay say "It was panned by the critics!": I said, "He was gubbed by the Particks!"
Just one or two be going with! Let me see what else I can muster for your hard-earnt bucket of Irn Bru!
Happy Days.